I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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