Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Randomize
