I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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