So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
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