dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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