I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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