maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
