look no pants
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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