Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
