i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
