Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
