I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Someone came in the potted fern
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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