So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize