Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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