I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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