he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Holy shit dude........stairs
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
