My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
