We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
