I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
