everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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