FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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