His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize