i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
