We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I just want to make out with him forever
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
