You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
