There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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