Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
