I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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