What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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