True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
