I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
