You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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