i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
