he thought i was a dude.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
