shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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