Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
