Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Drake has all the answers
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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