All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
He shit in the fireplace
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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