only if we run a train.
done.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
