He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
