My hand turned me down
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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