listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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