My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
