Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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