The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Randomize
