I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize