my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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