Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
