Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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