i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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